He just broke up with me (again) justifying it by saying that he can’t live with the fact that I’m living somewhere else. I told him I can’t trust him anymore and that I don’t want him to meet my friends anymore because it always end with him “almost” cheating on me with them or telling them how cute he thinks she is and beautiful or whatever. He said he can’t live like that (I mean what the hell did he expect me to say “everything’s alright keep doing it I will trust you forever with my life” ? Fuck off seriously 

I still can’t get over the fact that I loved him and I still feel love for him (I guess) But I know we don’t have a future together because he’s a little shit not able to keep a serious relationship. 

I can’t think about him having sex with another girl or loving another girl. It hurts but I know in 1 year I won’t think about it anymore because I’m not going to feel anything for him. The love would be gone. I’ll swear something to myself:

• I’m not going to have a relationship again before knowing the guy at least for a year. I want to know the person I want to spend my life with because I don’t want to have a lot of boyfriends in my life 

• I’m going to do sports because I want them to suffer when they see what they lost. Yes.. let me be vain. I mean.. there is a difference between cheating on Avril Lavigne then cheating on Beyonce.

• I’m going to live my life to the fullest 

• I also don’t want to have a boyfriend before starting to work but I guess it won’t be able to keep this one. 

I don't know what's happening with my life. My boyfriend doesn't love me anymore.. well that's what I think because he doesn't fucking care about me. We broke up for a short time because of all the shit he did and his new ''I'm becoming a man now and doesn't have to listen to what my gf says'' character. His new cold hearted behavior makes me wanna puke. He just hurt me really bad 3 times in a row! I don't have anything against friends but there is a different if there's a girl you just don't like because you know she's a bitch wanting to fuck everything that moves. If I say pls don't talk to that whore it's like I would say ''Pls tell her she's the only love in your whole fucking life and you want to marry her and have like 1000 children together'' I mean wtf.. what's wrong with that boy? It's not only him being in a relationship and if he doesn't want me to do shit why should he be allowed to do so? I know he's young but I'm too! I never did something that could really hurt him but after all what he did I don't think he's worth my love, passion and dedication.

That bitch just told my best friend how great he thinks she's and that he'd never thought she is that nice and ''good night cute actress'' I know it doesn't sound that bad but on german he used a word that you only say to girls you like ''that way'' and it's supposed to be me and not my fucking best friend. I mean he stole her number from my phone to talk to her although I told him I don't want him to talk to her because just NOT! I'm so angry. He's just not worth it. We've been together for more than four years and I thought I shouldn't give it up but I guess it's the only way. After all he has done I don't think I can love him anymore and with his new behavior I don't think he can give me the love I need. I'm super romantic and he was so cute before.. now he's just hanging out with his ex girlfriend and he seriously preferred spending new years eve with her instead of spending such an important day with me. And yes I think it is important because you spent that day, the new year, a new beginning with the person you love. For me it was my family and boyfriend but he just choosed her because I didn't want to go to her place to be with her. That's actually fucked up why are we still together?